An Ode to Depression

Now that it’s all said and done,
I can’t believe you were the one
To build me up and tear me down,
Like an old abandoned house.
What you said when you left
Just left me cold and out of breath.
I fell too far, was in way too deep.
Guess I let you get the best of me.

Well, I never saw it coming.
I should’ve started running
A long, long time ago.
And I never thought I’d doubt you,
I’m better off without you
More than you, more than you know.
I’m slowly getting closure.
I guess it’s really over.
I’m finally getting better.
And now I’m picking up the pieces.
I’m spending all of these years
Putting my heart back together.
‘Cause the day I thought I’d never get through,
I got over you. 

– Daughtry, “Over You”



I heard this song a few weeks ago on a run and it literally took my breath away. It’s a song I’ve listened to a million times before, but this time the words struck me to the core because I realized this is exactly how I feel about depression. I always knew it was killing me from the inside, but I never really knew how good life could be without it controlling me. Ironically, I should have started running a long, long time ago – both physically and emotionally – but sadly, I didn’t. Like so many others, I felt there was no way out of the mental anguish I was in, and yet all I had to do was run from it.

I am not the same person I was seven months ago and I am not the same person I will be seven months from now – but for the first time in my life, I am HAPPY with who I am. I am 32lbs lighter, (which is awesome) – but my transformation is soooooo much more than that. I have redefined my dream, I am learning to slow down and enjoy this life that comes and goes so quickly more than I ever have and most importantly, I am learning that it is OKAY to love yourself and take care of yourself.  Not only is it ok, it’s imperative to finding true happiness.

If I can change – ANYONE can change. It’s not easy – and some days are harder than others, but I have made a decision to put things in place to set myself up for success.

Make today the day you start running from depression. I promise you, this is one break up you will never regret.

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